Sitting, Waiting, Wishing

Posted on | July 9, 2010 | 3 Comments

Patience is a virtue. Good things come to those who wait. Have patience. We’ve heard these phrases before, platitudes meant to bring comfort, but in reality, only bring more frustration. Having patience is a sign that we trust in whatever will happen, that we are content enough to wait for what we want. A patient person is above the pettiness of wanting something without delay.

I am not that person.

I don’t think that I have a “gimme, gimme, gimme” attitude, but sometimes, when I want something, I simply don’t like waiting. Patience does not come naturally to me, not necessarily because I have to have things on demand, but rather because I’m not good at the waiting part. It seems torturous to wait for a favorite book or movie to be released. The long, arduous and frustrating process of getting into shape seems to take forever and it’s hard to see progress when it happens so slowly and methodically. My somewhat awkward and uncomfortable venture into the world of online dating has no end in sight because I’m not in control of what other people do.

I’m not good at being patient.

Last week, Kristin wrote a post in which she likened her tomato plants to the pitfalls of labels and the danger in stubbornly sticking to what you think you know. It’s a wonderful post, with great thoughts on opening up our minds to all the possibilities that might exist, instead of closing off our minds. And the whole time I was reading, all I could think was, “at least she has tomato plants. Mine are just leaves.” In my struggle with patience, I can’t even seem to summon the strength to patiently wait for my own plants to grow.

Patience is tricky, because it requires us to give up control. No matter how hard we work or how much effort we put forth, there will still come a time when we must let go and patiently wait for the next step to reveal itself. Of course this is difficult – it puts us in a passive position and takes the reigns out of our hands. It’s an uncomfortable feeling and not always a natural one, either.

In a lot of ways, being patient means we have to have faith – in ourselves, in the people around us and in all of the things we can’t control. Even when we want to be doing everything we possibly can to further our goals or resolve a conflict, sometimes taking a step back and exhibiting some patience with the situation is exactly what’s required. In that sense, it’s not about giving up control at all, but rather recognizing and acknowledging that we’ve done all we can do and now we simply have to trust in ourselves and in others that everything will work out.

While that may go against my natural inclinations, there’s a reason the cliches have stuck around for so long: cliche or not, it’s true – good things do come to those who wait. A couple of days after reading Kristin’s post and bemoaning about my own failed tomato plants, I saw them: tiny baby tomato and pepper plants, peeking out from underneath all the leaves, patiently waiting for me.

[Photo Credit: Me!]

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