Adventures in Online Dating, Vol. 1

Posted on | June 16, 2010 | No Comments

A few years ago, when some of my friends started getting engaged and then getting married, I was mostly happy for them. I didn’t particularly feel left out or jealous - after all, I wasn’t interested in being married then. I’ve been a bridesmaid a number of times now and, aside from uncomfortable bras and shoes, I’ve had a good time as a member of a wedding party.

Lately, though, the stakes are starting to get just a little bit higher. Last week, I found out that a very good friend of mine and her husband are expecting a baby, the first of my friends in my peer group to have a baby. Of course, I’m thrilled for her and excited to be an honorary aunt. But behind the happiness and excitement was just a little bit of panic.

I still don’t have an overwhelming desire to get married, though I’d certainly like to at some point. And I’d certainly like to have children at some point as well. But last week, I had this realization that “at some point” can’t be put off forever. I suddenly felt that if I didn’t do something, I’d be in danger of being left behind while all of my friends around me got married and had kids. (I realize that sounds dramatic, but it’s not so far-fetched; I can, quite literally, count on one hand the number of single friends I have.)

So, naturally, I did what any self-respecting 20-something in a panic would do – I joined an online dating site.

There’s a part of me that’s definitely thinking, “what the hell did you do that for?” But the other part of me says, “it’s about damn time!” I’ll be the first to admit it – I’m skeptical about online dating. But realistically, it’s a better option for me. I work with just one other person and spend a lot of time with my current friends and family. I just don’t meet a lot of new people during my everyday life. I’m not into the bar and club scene and the only guys I see at the library are fathers with their kids, grandpa’s and the occasional random homeless person – not exactly a great dating pool from which to pick.

And while I happen to think I’m pretty awesome, I also know that I’m not the bombshell babe who attracts attention. I’m hoping that, maybe, getting to know people online will help level the playing field and give guys the chance to see me for me, before that pesky physical appearance stuff gets in the way.

But mostly, I’m tired of waiting for life to happen to me. I’ve started taking charge of my life in other aspects; why not take charge of my woefully lacking social life as well? I might still be wary about marriage in general (the odds are technically stacked against me), but I do still very much believe in love and I’d like to be able to share my life with someone else. Even if it doesn’t work out, at least I’ll know I tried and I won’t regret letting this opportunity pass me by.

In the next installment of Adventures in Online Dating, dating site overload: Canadians and Trekkies and zombies, oh my!

[Photo Credit: Getty Images]

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